Nothing can prepare you for India. It doesn’t matter how many books you’ve read or friends you’ve spoken to or tv programs that you’ve watched. Nothing can prepare you for arriving at whichever international airport you land at, managing to negotiate customs, locate your bags and bleary-eyed head out into India beyond. It is, from that very first moment, an assault on the senses, noisy, chaotic, unfathomable, frustrating, and just, well, bloody brilliant.

Everyone who visits India does so with their own agenda, their own expectations, their own fantasy about what India will be or will do for them.  Yet, everyone reacts differently. India becomes individual, you can’t help but unravel the unexpected, and end up on a personal journey that was inevitably unplanned.

Cue now a quote from the first book I ever read on India and one which remains my firm favourite, James Cameron’s, An Indian Summer. He’d been met on arrival on his first visit to India by an old India hand who said,

‘’And at the end of it all, you will know less of the country than you do now. I take it that you would not have come to India without filling your head with some sort of nonsensical misinformation.’

As I said at the start, ‘Nothing can prepare you for India.’

One piece of advice that I have always tried to give to travellers, is never try to understand India, you won’t, and you will drive yourself insane in the process of trying to. India operates under it’s own unfathomable steam, the seemingly impossible invariably manages to come together at the last minute, logic rarely plays a part and it is a well-known fact that for everything you can say about India, the opposite it also true. Never was a truer statement uttered. The only constant is that India WILL make you feel. I’ve written about this before, many times. Whether pity, fear, awe or astonishment or being humbled.  (Whether from some genuine heartfelt hospitality from even just one of it’s 1.4 billion inhabitants to the sheer scale of the mighty Himalayan range, there is a lot that is humbling.)

Travel programs rarely grasp the reality of India, they may show a whole gamut from slums to five-star hotels but they don’t tend to get the essence of the country, like I said, it’s difficult to do. BUT recently on his latest, ‘Our Man In (this time) India,’ James May really tried to showcase just how bonkers, baffling and quite simply brilliant the country is.

I’ve not seen his other programs from other countries, but people say that it’s his natural reaction to events unravelling around him that make the program, and in India, there’s a lot of that going on, a lot of the time.  He travelled across the country from Mumbai on the Arabian Sea, somewhat predictably hitting on most of the well-known destinations that people would recognise, Udaipur, Jaipur, Agra, and Varanasi, but then threw in Calcutta (yes, yes, I know, Kolkata) a bloody brilliant and often sadly overlooked destination, before heading to Darjeeling and exploring the Sunderbans before ending on the Bay of Bengal.

In his soliloquy at the end, he states:

‘’India is an absolute riot. Everyone should come to INDIA. I do have a few handy travel hints for you.

·       The first please don’t come to India dressing a story or occur to sit in a temple and think that you’re going to get your head together because frankly you won’t and anyway that’s not India’s job.

·       Secondly, don’t come out here thinking you’re going to live out some last days of the Raj fantasy, because modern India is far more interesting and anyway that kind of thing is a little bit embarrassing.

·       And finally, please don’t come here and fret about India’s problems because the truth is they’re exactly the same problems as we have at home they’re just magnified here by the sheer size of the place and the number of people.

India always feels like it’s trying to beat you up, and I think that is the key to a successful visit is to walk out of your hotel, take a really deep breath and allow India to beat you up. You’ll enjoy it and it will do you good and don’t for a moment think that there is any point in fighting back because India will always win.’’

Thank you James May.

However! It will come as no surprise to many for me to have the final word or several. By and large, Mr May visited cities, with the odd exception, when he marvelled at the peace and quiet and friendly locals.  All cities in India have their own vibe, their own specialties, their own attractions, but they are cities at the end of the day, busy, bloody noisy, crowded and hectic places.  Now, since time immemorial, or that’s what it feels like, I have advocated for travellers to head into the countryside, go off beat, find a special rural destination, take time to savour it, meet the locals, chill out, and truly appreciate the true heart of the country, it’s people, savour a sunset, sitting around a camp fire, being hosted by fascinating people, delving into a local market, having chai with the locals and witnessing what is really special about India. I always used to almost bully clients into taking a 3 night rural break inbetween their bucket list cities. It was often a struggle, but I prevailed and what I can tell you is that 99 times out of 100 clients returned proclaiming that it was that off beat, special, rural place that was the highlight of their trip. Please, please do bear this in mind when planning a trip.

And also, being a wildlifer I can’t end this without mentioning another brilliant series on India currently being reshown on BBC 4; India – Natures Wonderland. I mention this, because it showcases a totally different India than the one James May travelled through. Both are series on India, and yet they are polar opposites.  And that is India.

I describe her as a mistress, the mistress that is India:

‘’India can’t be instantly appreciated, nor can she be rushed. She will reveal herself in her own time, she will move at her own pace.

You can’t demand from her nor hurry her along. India is magical, baffling, confusing and unfathomable and frustrating.

She is captivating and beguiling, fascinating, awe inspiring but most of all, enchanting.

When she is working with you, she is an unstoppable force. When the time isn’t right, she will leave you hovering indeterminately.

She is the land of the living oxymoron. Her features are multifaceted. She is a cruel mistress, yet she will bewitch and tease and lure you with her endless charms. She will test and she will provoke.

You can’t fight her or demand an outcome.  One merely has to accept her, love her and see where her journey takes you.’’

So, come on, what are you waiting for?

For travel advice, contact philippa@indianexperiences.com or WhatsApp +447966025330 or book an appointment to have a chat.