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Detox Day Three, What The Brochure Never Tells You.

Could a detox spa treatment be akin to giving birth? As in, you forget how bad it was the first time until you are in the midst of it again. To what am I referring? What is known, by those in the know, as Day Three Syndrome. The caffeine, booze and chocolate/crisp/bacon buttie stocks in your body are no longer being topped up, the body begins to rebel, or heal, depending on whose side you are on, resulting in inevitable headaches. I’ve been there and done it before when doing ayurveda, but never do I remember suffering like this.

It makes it marginally easier to know you are not alone. All your fellow inmates, sorry, I mean fellow guests, recognise it immediately and are unfailingly sympathetic, after all, for them it is a recent memory. Staff, also used to dealing with this appear regularly to ask how you are, how they can help, and amidst all this support one can catch glimpses of inmates and staff mouthing “Day three,” to each other accompanied by pointed looks in your direction, shared glances and knowing nods.

When one decides to visit a detox spa, or is invited to one, or is persuaded by some stunning photos and fancily written prose, this is the bit they don’t tell you about beforehand, the bit that never makes it into said glamorous promo material. I guess pictures of people throwing up, looking ghastly pale and clutching their heads might not sell quite so well.

Here at Prakriti Shakti, two point five days of pure goodness, more so given that the diet is raw and pure vegan too (no, my dear carnivore friends, raw food doesn’t mean sushi or steak tartare) and my body has started no only to rebel but begin a mutiny. The inevitable headache started two nights ago, that I was expecting, though not this severe, but today it was joined by pain very similar to the pain one has with Dengue Fever. For those of you lucky enough never to have had Dengue Fever, then imagine you’ve been smashed head on by a large truck. Your entire body hurts, a lot.

Now this happens because the body is releasing toxins, and it would seem that my body has a lot of toxins to release and given that my decision to come here was that I have developed an awful lot of body to release said lots of toxins from, oh, you get my drift. Forgive me, I type this at a point of delirium.

It is, however, essential to hang on in there. The old adage of “It gets worse before it gets better,” comes to the fore. I am here for a reason, that is to calm the mind, slim the body and become tall. I know, I know, the last one is a pipe dream but in the words of Meatloaf (see what this place does to you) Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad.

It is at this point that some people just feel that it’s not worth it, quit and head home, or to beaches or somewhere far less painful.  However, being from Yorkshire means that this is not an option for me. We are nothing if not stubborn, quitting is just not an option.  I can almost hear what my mother (God rest her soul) with her typical lack of sympathy, would have said, “What are you whingeing for, you got myself into this mess, it’s your own bloody stupid fault, get on with it and be quiet about it.” She would have had a point, hedonism and lack of will power have got me here, now it’s time to suffer the consequences.

So, stick it out I must and I have to say, the team here are dealing with it brilliantly; checking up on me, providing necessary room service and adapting my schedule for the day, dishing out unplanned therapy for body aches and have shown me a couple of valuable acupressure points for headaches too.  It is safe to say, they know what they are doing, and I feel that I am in very safe hands.  A large comfortable room with a beautiful view is also helping the day along.

However, it’s not all bad. Having such a bad day has got me out of all three sessions of yoga, a definite bonus. Also, it is obvious that in just three days the bloating that had plagued my body has disappeared (bloating, not fat mind) and for the first time in as long as I can remember, my ankles and feet no longer look like I have elephantitis. They are slim, well by my little fat feet standard anyway. I keep admiring them as I writhe around in pain and that alone is keeping me going. If that can be achieved in just three days, what will the results be after twelve?

For more information on where I am incarcerated, sorry, I mean enjoying a wonderful detox spa, check out Prakriti Shakti.

For more information as to why: http://memsahibinindia.com/2018/05/re-establishing-my-inner-shanti-whilst-shedding-my-outer-goddess/ 


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